It's Freshers' Week (or Freshers Fortnight for some of you lucky lot). The combination of all night dancing, sugary shots and kissing questionable strangers makes for the MOST FUN EVER - but then one day you wake up and you feel a bit... different. Not quite right. You shrug it off, it's probably nothing. It's definitely not Freshers Flu... Definitely not....
1. The sniffles
You start sniffing, maybe the odd cough, but it's nothing too serious, there's a school disco tonight and you've got your outfit sorted... You'll be fine.
2. The headache
I mean, it could just be all the tequila, right? That's all it will be. Nothing to worry about here...
3. More denial
'Me? No, no, I'm not ill. I feel great, I feel FABULOUS even. Turn that light down a bit though, my head is banging'
4. The constant sneezing
'No but really - ACHOO... I'm fi - ACHOO... Where are the tissu - ACHOO'
'WHY ME? WHY? JOHN FROM FLAT 5 HAS BEEN OUT TWO MORE NIGHTS THAN I HAVE AND HE IS FINE.'
6. Even more denial
Guys seriously, I'm alright. My whole body hurts but it's nothing a pound a pint can't fix... Honestly.
7. Hot and cold
Boiling. Freezing. Boiling. Freezing. Covers on. Covers off. Urgh.
'Maybe I SHOULDN'T go out tonight? But it is a toga party...I love togas.
9. Peer pressure
'Oh okay, I'll come out. I don't feel THAT bad. Is it cold in here? I'm REALLY cold. Guys?'
10. That hit by a truck feeling
A culmination of all your symptoms IN ONE GO. You would actually rather be hit by a truck.
It's all over. This is the end.
'I'm in so much pain...so much pain. I will never be well again. Ever.'
13. Calling your Mum
'Mum, please come get me. You don't understand, I am DYING. Hello? Mum?'