20 ridiculous things restaurants have used instead of plates

I wanted food, not a Sixth Form art installation.

Shittyplates

Right, listen up, restaurants. We need to have a serious chat. Hundreds of years ago, our ancestors had the good grace to invent plates. Even in a time when 'public sanitation' meant throwing human faeces onto passing strangers, even then they knew that they needed plates to eat food off.

So what's up? What's with all these non-plates? What's with all these boards, planks, pieces of slate and Christ knows what else? Maybe it was cool to serve a burger on a plank of wood in the late 2000s, but that time has passed.

WE WANT PLATES. GIVE US PLATES. NOT THIS SHIIIIIT.

  1. 1 A mini picnic table
  2. 2 A dustpan and brush
  3. 3 A shoe
  4. 4 A guillotine
  5. 5 A melted record
  6. 6 A scientific beaker
  7. 7 A skateboard
  8. 8 A mirror

    We can only hope that this is a joke, otherwise our nursing homes are in a worse state than we imagined.

  9. 9 A piece of tree
  10. 10 Paint cans
  11. 11 A coal shovel
  12. 12 A mini pallet
  13. 13 A plastic skip
  14. 14 An axe...?
  15. 15 A sink
  16. 16 A wooden paddle
  17. 17 A wicker hamper
  18. 18 A plant pot
  19. 19 A table tennis paddle
  20. 20 Whatever the fuck this is meant to be

    Feature © Ross O'Carroll-Kelly / Rich Hooper / Rose Lloyd